Kickoff Concoction: Fickin Fauxchos

I forgot it was Super Bowl Sunday until 6 p.m., when I turned it to the game and there was less than one minute left in the first quarter. OOPS! I guess this means no chance of attending a party or gathering of any sort. It's probably better that I don't show up to my interview tomorrow suffering from a "Bears Won (or Lost)!" appearance, i.e. still half-drunk.

In the spirit of the game however, I got a hankering for a ginormous plate of nachos. This was soon followed by the realization that I didn't have salsa, chips/tortillas, or really any makings for said nachos. But, being the Betty Crocker-wannabe that I am, I decided to improvise. Plus, I was frickin' starving.

I started by chopping up a bell pepper and an onion and sauteing them in olive oil with a little salt and lots of black pepper until they were really caramelized, some might say nearly burned. To this mixture, I added about 3 cloves of chopped garlic, cumin, chili powder, turmeric, and paprika. Like Veganne, I never measure spices, so I just put in a good pinch of each. I let this cook for a few minutes to bring the oils out of the spices some and get rid of the raw garlic flavor.

While this was going, I found a can of Eden organic unsalted, black beans, which are one of my favorite foods, in the pantry. In fact, my friends are sick of hearing me tout Amy's canned, refried black beans. I rinsed those off really well in cold water and put them in the blender.

When the onion/pepper mixture had cooled off a bit, I threw it in the blender with the beans, a couple pickled jalapeno slices, and a little more olive oil. I soon realized this wasn't mixing well, so I threw in a little cold water to help lubricate it. Haha.

I then rummaged through my pantry to figure out what my "chips" would be for these pseudo-nachos. I had lentils, quinoa, a box of tabouli mix, jasmine rice, brown rice, and couscous from which to choose. I figured that, since it is the Super Bowl, I could and would be bad, and went with the jasmine rice. I threw a half-cup of that in with a cup of water, brought it to a boil, rinsed it, and then put another cup of water in it to boil (this is a new trick I've started using to keep the rice from getting too sticky/mushy, which tends to be a problem with me and jasmine rice).

I remembered I had a bag of Morningstar Farms Chik'n Strips in the freezer, so I put some of those in the same pan I sauted my onion mix in and heated them through.

I piled about half the rice in the middle of my plate and put a generous slathering of bean mix on top, followed by a scoop of shredded cheese (yes, this wasn't vegan or low-cal), and then the "chicken." I took a few pics before shoveling it in my pie hole, and needless to say, it was delicious, though perhaps too garlicky. I know, I know, that seems impossible for me, but next time, I'll add a little less garlic and cook it a little longer. Also, I can't get enough spice, so I'd put a little more jalapeno and have salsa on hand. I accidentally left mine out on the counter the other night and was afraid I'd get dysentery or salmonella if I ate it, otherwise I would've. Guacamole would be good too, but I had my fill of avocado yesterday. All-in-all, it was a successful experiment. TOUCHDOWN! Fifteen yard penalty, SUCK IT!